Snore . . . It's Another Annual Holiday Letter

It has been a week since I finished designing our Christmas card, and you might've thought that I would have actually sent them out sometime this past week.

Well, it didn't happen. I had a busy week and I caught a little bug, so things didn't play out like I had planned. No biggie though, remember I'm not stressing this year.

Sunday I sat on the couch, coughing and hacking, and I conjured up our annual Christmas letter. I'm going to share it with you now, but first I'd like to prepare you.

I know that some people think that annual holiday letters are impersonal and nauseating, but I implore you to reconsider. The annual letter doesn't have to be a chore to read. You just have to know what not to include in it.

When I write our annual letter, I try very hard not to simply vomit out the events of our past year. The other thing I try to avoid is blowing sunshine all over ourselves with tales of how excellent we think we are. People don't like that.

When I write our holiday letter, I try instead to give people little snippets of our personalities. This is much easier to do with the kids, because we are constantly observing them and being entertained by their antics. Adults are quite a bit more boring.

If you choose to read on, you will soon see that my holiday letter is pretty much like my posts. Full of sarcasm and silliness.

However, before you forge on, there is one pretty huge thing I must prepare you for.

Peanut Head's real name is Clark.

I know, bizarre.

That said, read on if you're up to it.

Merry Christmas and Happy New Year! I don't expect this will make it to you before Christmas, but if I can get these cards out before Christmas, well then, I'm okay with that. I just hope this finds you all happy, healthy and well.

We've had a good year, and we are very thankful for all that we have, although the girls continue to grow against our wishes and seemingly out of control.

Zoe is 7 and in the second grade now. The world is still very black and white to her, and I'm guessing it always will be. She makes us tired sometimes with her incessant talking. Jabber, jabber, jabber, all the time. And if she wants an explanation, she won't let us get away with not answering her, completely and to her satisfaction. If she's not happy with our explanation, she goes all indignant on us.

One day the girls were playing with their cars on their car rug when Zoe asked me what a bike route was. After I explained it to her, she and Annika started arguing, because Zoe told her that a motorcycle could go on a bike route since it was really a bike without pedals. When I corrected her, she got quite irritated with me and said "Mom, you better go back to the grade you learned that in, and listen very carefully!" Of course I started laughing hysterically. She was not amused and, to this day, thinks I don't know what I'm talking about. I'm feeling a little short-changed, because I thought this part wasn't supposed to come until she was a teenager. Don't parents know everything until their kids are teenagers?

Annika is 5, going on 16, and in Kindergarten. We just know she's going to be our Goth child, or its equivalent in her time. She's her own person and doesn't put up with Zoe's bossiness, or anyone else's for that matter. She challenges us quite frequently, which we don't understand because it's not like she gets away with it. We keep telling her, as her parents we will always win. In spite of all the obstinacy, Annika entertains us as much as ever.

Forever the child to use inappropriate language appropriately, Annika walked into Clark's workshop one day and said to him in her stern, all-business voice "Daddy, pick up all this crap! It's a disaster in here!" Now I ask you, in all honesty, how do you discipline your child when you're rolling on the floor laughing? This girl keeps us on our toes, that's for sure.

The girls and Clark are still taking Karate lessons. It's hard to believe, but it has been three years since they started. It has been a fun process to watch them learn and gain more control of their bodies. Zoe is very methodical in learning the movements, while Annika just wants to kick some butt, and she does some freaky fast kicks. One day I asked her to punch my arm, just to see what she was packing, and I about cried, it hurt so bad.As if I didn't have enough to do, this year I discovered blogging. It's something I've wanted to do for a long time, but I wasn't sure how to get started. A friend showed me how easy it was, and the rest is history. My blog is a place for me to post and share my digital scrapbooking, crafts, recipes and things that are going on in our lives. Basically, it's a journal with pictures. Lots of pictures. And a teensy bit of sarcasm. If you're interested in checking it out, I'll leave the web address at the end of this letter.Clark is still working at the Idaho National Lab, and this time of year he's just trying to stay warm and avoid the field work that he seems to always be in such demand for. He has one more day of work this year, and then we're all going to enjoy two weeks together before the obligations of work and school begin again. We have great plans to do some sledding, snow shoeing, skating, and even lay around lazily watching movies and reading books, with some naps sprinkled in here and there. It sounds like bliss to me.We still have one dog, Sammie, and one cat, Jo Jo. As much as the girls and I have begged and begged for a second cat, Clark just won't give in. He's been a bit of a Grinch on this subject, but I have to agree that it is nice not having so many pets for a change.Sammie gets around much slower these days, and she doesn't enjoy the cold weather at all. Watching her maneuver the stairs is downright painful. She goes upstairs slowly, THUMP-THUMP, THUMP-THUMP, one step at a time. You don't want to be behind her, unless you're looking to spend awhile on your ascent, because you can't pass her. She goes up slightly canted and hogs the whole width of the stairs.Jo Jo, as you can see from our holiday card, is not enjoying herself at this present time. It seems that she's been in a cat fight, and she's a lover, not a fighter. She got some nasty wounds on her forehead, and she wouldn't leave them alone to heal, hence the Poinsettia plate head. She's so angry that she refused to smile for our holiday picture. Unfortunately, the poinsettia plate didn't last long before she was able to scrape it off her head, and we had to resort to a plastic cone made for little Fifi dogs. She's humiliated, to say the least.So, as ever, we are alive and well, Jo Jo excepted. We wish you and yours a happy, safe and healthy holiday season and New Year.Love, Jill, Clark, Zoe and Annika Scott.

So there you have it, the annual Scott Family Holiday Letter. I hope you were able to endure it.By the way, Zoe just read it and she's already giving me a tongue lashing. "I'm not black and white! There's colors all around us!" And "You're making Annika turn 16! She can't be 16!"She's so literal. And black and white.